Saturday, June 9, 2007

Reading a lady's body language.

Learning how to read a person's body language is very essential in socialising and not just when it comes to attracting the opposite sex.


Reading body language

Doesn't matter whether she is interested in you, you'll make her interested eventually anyway:) But look for these signs to show you whether you're already making progress:) It's also fun to look for these signs as a by-stander, either in everyday situations or for example in a bar - when the guy earnestly believes he is being sooo smooth but the woman he is talking to isn't displaying any of the signs presented below, you can't help but have a chuckle about it:)

Her lips:

Big smiles with upper and lower teeth showing with a relaxed face.
Biting of the lips or showing of the tongue, licking her lips or touching of her front teeth.
She wets her lips, some women use only a single-lip lick, wetting the upper or lower lip, while others run the tongue around the entire lip area.
She puts her fingernail between her teeth.
She protrudes her lips and thrust her breasts forward.

Her eyes:

She gazes in your eyes with deep interest and her pupils are dilated.
She raises both eyebrows exaggeratedly for a couple of seconds, this is often combined with a smile and some eye contact.
She winks at you while talking to you or winks at you from a distance.
While talking to you, she blinks more than usual, fluttering her eyelashes.
Eyebrows raised and then lowered, then a smile indicates interest in you.

Her hair:

She pushes her fingers through her hair. This can be one hand movement or more of a stroking motion.
She twirls her hair around her fingers while she is looking at you.
She is throwing her hair back off her shoulders.

Her clothing:

The hem goes up to expose a little more leg.
She is fixing, patting or smoothing her outfit to make herself look better.

While she is seated:

She moves in time to the music, with her eyes on you.
She starts sitting straight up and her muscles appear to be firm.
She is sitting with her legs open.
She sits with her legs crossed in a manner to reveal her thigh.
Her legs are rubbing against each other.
Her legs are rubbing against the leg of the table.
Her crossed leg is pointed towards you or if that same leg is rocking back and forth towards you.

Her hands:

She exposes the palms of her hand facing you.
While talking to you, she rests an elbow in the palm of one hand, while holding out her other hand, palm up.
She rubs her wrists up and down.
She rubs her chin or touches her cheek. This indicates that she's thinking about you and her relating in some way:)
She is fondling keys, sliding hands up and down a glass, playing with toys or other things on the table.
She plays with her jewellery, especially with stroking and pulling motions.
She touches your arm, shoulder, thigh, or hand while talking to you (in case you already haven't started doing the same to her yourself, dumbass:).
She is pretending to look at her watch as you pass her.

Her voice:

She raises or lowers the volume of her voice to match yours.
She speeds up or slows down her speaking to match yours.
She laughs in unison with you.
In a crowd she speaks only to you and focuses all of her undivided attention on you.

Micellaneous:

She mirrors your body language and body positions.
Her skin tone becomes red while being around you.
She leans over and speaks into her friend's ear, just like in junior high school.
She is standing with her head cocked slightly at an angle, one foot behind the other, hips slightly thrust forward.
At a party - every once in a while she seems to appear out of nowhere in your vicinity and if you move to another spot, soon she appears out of nowhere again, you catch her glancing in your general direction (actually, glancing at YOU dummy!:), she bumps into you… accidentally, touches you… accidentally etc:)


When talking to a girl, these are some of the more important signs to watch for:

Can you keep conversation going with her?
Does she react well to you touching her physically( touch as in friendly gesture kinda touch, not molesting, you idiot.)?
Does she touch you(again, is she comfortable enough or attracted enough towards you in order to start touching u in a friendly manner yet)?
Does she laugh?

Now I don't have to explain what the answer "yes" to these questions means, do I:)

All these signs usually tell you that the girl is captivated by your charms. But before you get there, chances are that her body language changes as the discussion progresses. Make sure that you watch her closely and as soon as you get a sign that should be an indication that you are on the right track, keep going in that direction. If the opposite happens, just change the subject and see what happens."

The really gorgeous and beautiful girls however very seldom get around to displaying the signs of interest described above. They simply don't have to, as they are used to getting some attention already long before that. With such girls you have to be on a lookout for the initial and thus much more subtle signs of interest. One example of this would be a gorgeous girl simply looking at your face. Obviously people tend to look at what or whom they like to look at. But whereas an average girl first just looks at your face and then progresses into the more overt signs of interest described above, looking at your face from time to time might be the only sign of interest you'll ever get from the most beautiful of girls.
So if you think you're not getting any signs of interest from beautiful girls - you are, but you just can't see them well enough yet.

Here are signs of interest sent from across the room. Most are applicable to both sexes. The sequence of the list approximates the courtship sequence.

I'M INTERESTED

Sidelong glance(s)
Looks at you a few times
Holds your gaze briefly
Downcast eyes, then away
Posture changes to alert
Preens, adjusts hair, attire
Turns body toward you
Tilts head
Narrows eyes slightly
Smiles
Matches your posture
Eyes sparkle
Licks her lips
Thrusts breasts forward

DON'T BOTHER ME

Never sneaks a peek
Fleeting eye contact
Looks away quickly
Looks away, eyes level
Posture unchanged
Does no preening
Turns body away
Head remains vertical
Eyes remain normal
Neutral, polite face
Posture unchanged
Normal or dull eyes
Keeps mouth closed


In Summary.
Frequency of eye contact, the more the better. Amount of time she, or he, holds your gaze, the longer the better. How she breaks off eye contact, down before away is great! Shine of the eyes, the brighter the better. Direction of body, toward you, good, away, bad. Overall posture, erect and alert are good. Tilt of head, vertical is bad, increased tilt is great. Where the drink is held, high in front as a barrier, that's bad. Hand activity, clenched, squeezing or pinching is bad, open, caressing or stroking is great.
Most of us are slightly afraid as well as somewhat excited in settings where social interaction is expected and required. So, most people do not sit or stand in an open posture. But, during courtship, the more open the other person's posture is, the more open that person is to you and your advances. And, the more open you are, the more likely the other person is to open up to you.
First Conversation Signals.
Men, pay attention to all the ways she communicates during the first few minutes as you talk with her.

KEEP TALKING

Alert, energetic
Pupils dilated
Gradually opens posture
Lowers drink
Touches self gently
Caresses objects
Crosses and uncrosses legs
Flashes of palm
Crossed legs steady
Dangles shoe on toe
Hands never touch face
Touches you any reason
Feet firmly on floor
Loosens anything
Leans forward
Steady hands, feet

MOVE ON

Tense, restless
Normal or small pupils
Posture remains closed
Keeps drink high
Grips or pinches self
Squeezes, taps objects
Legs remain crossed
Back of hand gestures
Swings crossed legs
Keeps shoe on
Touches face
Never touches you
Feet on edges or toes
Tightens anything
Leans away
Tapping, drumming

In social settings, most of us start out in a closed, defensive posture because we're a bit apprehensive. A closed posture feels safe. When the person you are talking with shifts to a more open posture, it signifies trust and comfort. That person is, literally, opening up to you and what you have to offer.
It takes courage to open up to the other person. If you go first, she, or he, will usually follow your move from closed to slightly more open.

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